Thursday, August 22, 2013

Matthew 19:6 Fighting in a Marriage.

So many people give up on their marriage these days, what ever happened to "Till Death Do Us Part"? 

Yes, God may throw some curve balls in our relationships but he is doing it to test our bond. No matter what happens we are suppose to work through it together, no matter how big or small.

Pray about it. Pray by yourself and pray with your spouse. 

Talk about it. Talk, not yell. No matter how angry you are, yelling gets you nowhere. My husband has to remind me of this. I am so quick to get angry and yell. You'd be surprised how well the argument goes when you are calm and relaxed. 

Know How You Feel. Using the words "I feel..." is a great start to a conversation. Knowing how you feel and sharing it with your spouse will really help. It will help control your anger and your husband/wife will know from the start what is going on in your mind. 

Equal Time. While talking it out make sure you give your spouse time to tell you how they feel as well! Don't forget that they too are in the argument and have things to say. Once you are finished sharing your feelings and problems let them share theirs. Don't forget to be considerate. They sat and listened to you, now it's your time to hear them out. Don't interrupt, let them finish.

Feedback. During the conversation give your spouse feedback. If they state that they are feeling a certain way, reply with a question such as "What I'm understanding from what you just said, is that you wish that we could spend more time together?"  Doing this will show them a) you are listening and b) you are trying to understand what they are saying. If you do this you can make sure that the conversation is clear and that when it is over there were no misunderstandings. 

Remember, God wants us to work through our problems! Marriage is a promise not just to each other but to him as well. 

What do you do to help work out an argument? Any more tips for those who may need help?

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